Alcoholism – Effects on Innocents

Alcoholism – a dependence syndrome touched my life from birth until recent times.

My father was a full-blown alcoholic (a man I loved in spite of his addiction). His

days started with his house painting job and ended when the corner bar closed.

For certain this had a multitude of negative effects on my life, from living

arrangements to bullied by classmates for wearing another girl’s hand-me down clothes.

The supposed friend boasted daily about her clothing now being worn by one far

less fortunate, me.

Yes, it’s quite interesting what the mind remembers from years ago.

In my teen years at parties I’d watched my Cape Verdean boyfriend consume booze

until he actually became physically sick. I couldn’t figure out the connection as why

a fairly smart handsome young man would participate in such an activity.

I was one of the few ‘bystanders’ at parties – no way – no thanks – upchucking was

definitely not for me.

Years later I married a man whose family owned two bars. On Friday nights he’d

bartender at one for extra income. He knew better than drink all the freebies

the patrons purchased for him; he was really good at pretend and placed the cash

in a jar.

Time marched on and urban development took the bars and a new adventure

on the scene, a kitchen and lounge. For a few years weekends I waitressed the

kitchen side along with my oldest daughter. I was the nominee due to age factor

venturing over to the lounge whenever a customer requested an alcoholic

beverage.

Did I ever consume alcohol? Yes, three glasses of mixed sweet beverages

to keep hydrated throughout so many Saturday nights, a sip here ‘n there

and right back out on the dance floor.

My marital home contained a good-sized liquor cabinet; however I’m

thankful I never had the desire to indulge in other than the occasional

glass of wine served with dinner and iced cold beer (disliked taste) at

family barbecues.

Perhaps it was my outlook on life ‘don’t want my family to experience

my youth’ since a high percentage follow in their parent(s) footsteps.

This disease as it’s referred has touched many members of my former

family and sad to learn details of each one’s battle and how their life

crumbled as refusal help leaves little loved ones can do for them.

A little twist here – a man from my hometown I met on a dating site.

The first evening we dined out I noticed his glassy eyes only thought

little of them since it was winter and quite cold outdoors. With his

dinner he ordered a beer then another. I dated him on and off for

a period of three years (platonic dates since via his own words I

was a nice woman and he a player).

He suffered from OCD and issues with anxiety thus kept his dates

fairly local. Eventually he told me his story over a three-hour Chinese

meal. He drank due to the loss of his mother at a young age. I

encouraged him to seek help; however my attempts were in vain

One day I plain tired of his games, we parted ways and no

longer communicate via phone nor e-mail messages.

Done!

There’s a valid reason for my writing this post today. A few

months ago I interacted with someone from the creator app my

family has been working for near four years.

The man’s lip synching evoked emotions within me, a gal who’d

pretty much managed to numb out her feelings on life in general.

We became virtual friends and he shared parts of his life, his

treatment and the mechanisms of day-to-day life and the

12-step journey.

I researched a bit and tried my best to let him know how

valuable life is and share with him how at times we all suffer

from degrees of depression.

Then without warning he chose to shut me out – OUCH. My

beautiful inspirational quotes were delivered, perhaps he did

read them only the messenger app’s gray check with a white

tick alerted me to the fact I was being ignored.

This was the end of another journey for me and like before

in the end it was I who’d experience anguish at the loss of a friend.

I’ve vowed never to repeat this pattern again unless the person

with the problem is an actual ‘immediate’ family member.

I’d been warned, I didn’t listen and even at this late stage in

life the wrath of rejection following good deeds is quite hurtful.

SoCS: June 12th 2021

prompt: drive

Finally found drive blog more often
Lucky me wi-fi connection malfunction

Early morn felt pangs internet defeat
Cable provider proud occupant driver’s seat

Amazing technology still scads inability control
Shopping trip cool off cessation feeling blood boil

Creative gal love crochet items since back-in-day
Drive near hour specific brand yarn sale underway

Unfamiliar territory avoid traffic side street turn off
Lucky me, a one-way and ahead approaching car – city cop


Flagged pullover in progress driver warning heeds
Overgrown tree branches hid traffic sign politely she pleads

Rethink out-of-town sales option save shopper oodles cash
Fortunate day honest error, no GPS, result drive humongous laugh.

https://lindaghill.com/2021/06/11/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-12-2021/




What Do You See #85 – June 7th 2021

A kitten so adorable, so tiny compared to a full-grown cat captures my heart.

I think back of teenage days, a trip to my girlfriend’s uncle’s farm and a litter

of kittens awaiting adoption inside a red barn.

That Sunday I would return home with my first pet, a calico kitten.

I named her Toastie perhaps due to her multi-colors – hard to remember now.

She was an indoor kitten who when I went to school would tear the wallpaper

to shreds.

Perhaps that’s what today is referred to as separation anxiety from the only

individual in the household who was capable of actual love, me.

I don’t know how long Toastie was with me – perhaps my parents intentionally

let her go outdoors when I was studying hard at school.

Thinking back ‘she disappeared’ were the words told to me.

I’d never see my cute, cuddly Toastie again.

She was the first and last kitten / cat in my life.

Although I always preferred cats versus dogs once married I heard the word, ‘NO’.

https://lifeafter50forwomen.com/2021/06/07/what-do-you-see-85-june-7th-2021/

Simply 6 Minutes Challenge

First glance of the pic led me to believe this animal species could possibly be the

Vietnamese Orangutan ‘Pongo hooijeri’, an endangered species.

At second glance I took note of the creature’s facial features and oh the long nose

of the rather ugly animal would define it as an ant eater.

An anteater specializes in eating insects.

Although this one is quite gigantic I could’ve used a mini-one earlier this morn.

My urge to pee was greater than my urge to stop the black carpenter ant

(a nervous wreck) made himself at home touring the vanity walking on

numerous personal items.

Void of a long-handled weapon, helpless, I had no choice other than watch

the segmented bugger.

Adamant that ant would soon meet his maker, upon arising after washing my

hands I was on a mission to stop him dead in his tracks.

Success, one less carpenter ant!

Word count: 147 to 150 (if this is inaccurate, blame it on the block editor – tough time.

https://christinebialczak.com/2021/06/08/simply-6-minutes-welcome-to-the-challenge-06-08-2021/



News Article of Concern Read Earlier This Morn

Prior to breakfast a news article from a reputable source peaked my interest.

I was shocked!!

This article was the first one I’d read on the topic of the Covid-19 vaccines

failure to produce antibodies to those taking immunosuppressive medications.

Following are a few notes ‘not verbatim’ rather hits or miss jots of information.

To me they are a major concern since I’ve been under treatment for two

of the top 10 out of 100 on the list – one for near a decade.

I’d no prior information on the topic read; however, I did note studies have

been in progress for average time period of three months.

Written was how “Millions of Americans might not have adequate response

to the vaccine.”

Unbelievable!

A few actual case histories were discussed in length.

Imagine a person taking the two-dose Pfizer’s vaccine plus one dose J & J and

results of their lab blood work showed ‘no detectable’ antibodies.

The reports were from major sources and top hospitals so undoubtedly this read

wasn’t one of fake news nature.

The last few months I stopped allowing my good morning mood soon turn into a

bad one after accessing and trying to make sense of all the negative news

found on social media..

Perhaps I’d miss prior info. I’ll never know.

A statement of interest was how now
since the above discovery the major

agencies are advising people against checking for antibodies while a

minimal amount of people ‘so fearful’ entered into unchartered territory and

opted to get an extra supplement.

In my locale masks are no longer required in most places and as hideous as it

sounds it appears we’re operating on an ‘honor’ system.

Photo Challenge # 368 – Hands

https://mindlovemiserysmenagerie.wordpress.com/2021/06/01/photo-challenge-368/

picture credit ~ Natalia Drepina

Daytime turns darkness night

Cemetery iron gates closed and locked

As visitors of loved ones return to their homes

Deceased inhabitants begin to stir within their graves

Stealthily countless hands penetrate freshly mowed grass

Sounds e’er creepy unknown heard scare late night walkers

Void of flashlights unable to capture a pic or quick view all

Passersby disturbed flee scared to death an understatement

Unseen shaking to and fro hands those gone before us

Participating in nightly ritual private dance unimaginable

No invitations nor R.S.V.P. s sight unseen prior to initiation rites

Sorority members this group reserved for those led life via guiding light.



Can You Hear Me Now??

I don’t think I’ve been so frustrated as I am with today’s technology!!!!

You take a few days or weeks hiatus and you come back faced with quite

the challenge.

Wait a moment add an ‘s’ and make challenge plural CHALLENGES!!

All set to write I took a picture on my cell phone of a Sony Digital Voice

Recorder.

Yeah, today I don’t have to search for a picture. WRONG!!

Fine next idea try and find one by utilizing the search – HA, HA, HA!!

Exact four words ‘Sony Digital Voice Recorder’ and up pops captures of

every item possible ‘other‘ than a recorder.

Wow, look at those cell phones, selfie rings, keyboards, digital tapes,

microphones, etc.

Somehow I managed to brave this disappointing journey and ‘NOT‘ scream

out loud.

Who needs this stress??

Frustrated as a word I refrain from typing, I’ll finish up and leave this place.

I need to go for a walk before I open up the box containing said recorder.

Quick view – conclusion likelihood of more frustration ahead a ‘nine out

of tenfor the afternoon.

Do manufacturers of tech do this on purpose? I wonder if they’re in

cahoots with optometrists.

The wording is so small one needs a powerful magnifying glass.

Imagine I typed a ‘vent’ post without uttering a single word.

Somehow I practiced self-control therefore ‘NO‘ you didn’t hear me scream.